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Rules of engagement: How to tackle wedding planning arguments

Rules of engagement: How to tackle wedding planning arguments | CHWV

Say goodbye to wedding planning stress with our top tips for handling those common arguments.

Wedding planning can be a lot of fun – there’s no doubt about it – but it does have its dark side too. Whether you’ve overspent on a budget you forgot to set or your groom’s lack of involvement is causing pre-marital strain, arguments needn’t overshadow the excitement of wedding planning.

Argument #1 How much you spend on the dress

Let’s face it; if there’s one thing it’s easy to overspend on it’s the wedding dress. No matter how many dresses there are in a shop, once you’ve found ‘the one’ there’s no going back – even if it is double your budget!

Solution: It’s easy to fall in love with a wedding dress – so your groom does have to be accepting of that. However, don’t try on wedding dresses that are way over your budget. When visiting boutiques, it’s a good idea to ask for recommendations with an affordable price tag that fit within your budget.

Argument #2 Going over budget

You only need to go over by a little on each of your big day elements to be faced with a hefty bill at the end. Whether you decide to spend a little more on your décor or can’t resist an upgraded catering package, the cost of a wedding can add up.

Solution: Before anything, set a budget! Decide on a total budget for your wedding and then split that budget into separate categories, prioritising spend on those areas that matter most to you. And most importantly, stick to it.

Argument #3 Your obsession with all those little details

Every day we're swamped with gorgeous weddings. There are hundreds of beautiful real life weddings online, not to mention the dreamy inspiration on Pinterest. Of course, it’s only natural that you'd want the picture perfect wedding too, with all those little details in place. They matter more than he’ll ever know.

Solution: You’ve heard it before and you’ll no doubt hear it again but don’t sweat the small stuff! On the day itself, your guests won’t even notice those little details – and you’ll be having so much fun that neither will you!

Argument #4 The groom’s involvement… or lack of!

They get it in the neck when they suggest a footie themed wedding and get moaned at for their lack of excitement and involvement in planning the day. Sometimes, it’s hard for the groom to get it right.

Solution: When you begin planning your wedding, decide on tasks you can do together and tasks you can allocate to your groom. This way, you’ll get to enjoy the experience together and he’ll enjoy the fact that he’s got a few responsibilities too.

Argument #5 Making decisions

Should you go for your dream designer dress that’s way over budget or a simpler gown that’s half the price? And when it comes to your wedding cake, how can you split all your favourite flavours into just three tiers? If you struggle to make decisions, wedding planning may be a chore!

Solution: Making a decision is never easy – especially when it comes to a big day like your wedding. The easiest way to minimise stress, however, is to write up a list of pros and cons. It may also be a good idea to put yourself in someone else’s shoes and pretend you’re advising a friend.

Argument #6 Family matters

Has your mum decided to make your home her own place of residence for the duration of the wedding planning? Are your sisters invading the lounge every weekend for wedding crafting? Too much time with the family can be a bad thing!

Solution: Family members will definitely step in and try and have their say but the most important thing is to step out and avoid stressing. Listen to their advice and opinions but don’t necessarily do what they say or advise. They’ll appreciate the fact you’re listening to them. It’s also important to be patient too – they won’t be able to hold a grudge or nag at you for too long.

Argument #7 The other party

Whether it’s his best man you don’t trust or he thinks you’ve gone way overboard with your hen, it’s the pre-wedding bash that’s known for causing arguments.

Solution: Engaging with each other and talking things through is the most sensible thing to do when it comes to hen and stag parties. Avoid being passive aggressive – this will only make things worse – and instead voice your concerns in a reasonable manner.

Argument #8 Non-stop wedding talk

Is date night becoming yet another night to talk floral arrangements? Or perhaps bed times have become the perfect time to vent about your bridesmaids… much to your groom’s frustration.


Solution: Remember that wedding planning doesn’t have to take over your life. Make time for wedding planning and schedule it in – leaving the rest of your time together for fun. Wedding-free date nights are also a must!


So if wedding planning is causing stress and arguments, wouldn’t it be amazing if we could make it all disappear? Well, you’re in luck! Download our new guide, The Ultimate Wedding Checklist, and take the hard work and sleepless nights out of your wedding planning!

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